Can I find love?

Hey, this is my first ever post here, so please bear with me.

I’m a 21 year old gay man struggling to find love. It’s not unusual for me to face challenges in dating, especially when most of the people I’ve met have been obsessed with the idea of me being skinny for them.

For context, I’ve lost around 30-32 kg, going from obese and unhealthy to somewhat fit and healthy. But I didn’t do it for somebody, I did it for myself and for my health.

Now, coming back to my story. I was talking to this guy I met at a family function. He approached me, asked for my number, and we started talking every day- calls, texts, everything. He lives in a different state, about 800 km away, which made it difficult for us to meet, but he had no issues coming to see me. I really liked that about him. And to be honest, I liked the fact that he was into me, something that didn’t usually happen when I was obese.

We talked daily, and he often mentioned how much of a gym freak he is, he loves working out, and most of our conversations revolved around fitness. I go to the gym too, so we vibed well. But one day, he suddenly asked, “Can I ask you something?”

I said “What?”

And he said, “Can you lose 6 more kg for me?”

That completely caught me off guard. I asked why, and he said, “Because you’re still a bit chubby, and fat people turn me off. I don’t know why 👉🏻👈🏻”

I was speechless and honestly, a little curious. As much as I respect that everyone has their own preferences, I wanted to understand why he approached me in the first place knowing that I was chubby. When I asked, he replied, “You’re cute, but you’d look cuter if you lost 6 more kg.”

He then added, “I don’t think it’s an issue if my partner asks me to change something. I wouldn’t mind changing for them.”

I stayed. I don’t know why, but I did for as long as I could. Until it got to a point where I started feeling demotivated and sad all the time because “somebody” didn’t prefer the way my body looked.

But the question still stands-

Can I find love that goes beyond physical appearance and attributes?