rabbit hole.

No matter where I am
no matter what I'm going
she's there
suffocating me and clouding my thoughts
She always kept her claws sunk into my skin
Making sure I stayed in that rabbit hole
never able to get out

Just as I began to loose hope
I saw a light
along with a hand
who yanked me out of her grasp, even if it hurt
embracing me in your arms, feeling the freedom that came with escaping that rabbit hole
you were a new light in my life
the one that always shone in my dark rabbit hole.

I knew she wasn't gone however
always lurking
always angry
always ready
waiting for a moments weakness to drag me back into the rabbit hole.

you never gave up on me
no matter how many times she succeeded
always pulling me back
staying gentle, staying kind
something warm
thawing to the cold of the rabbit hole.

I know she's there
she's there when I lash out
she's the worst of me
and she uses it to her advantage
to push you away so I can sink deeper
since she knows I can't climb my way out
of the rabbit hole.

The rabbit hole is my own
I dug myself into it
Scared of the outside world
and she became someone new,
someone reliable.

But now I know.
she's not reliable but instead a leech.
Sucking me dry
and I know shes my battle to fight
But I still would like to thank you
for encouraging me
even when I seem hopeless
and lost.

(context: mental health.)
(feedback welcome as always!!)
1.https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1ep436r/comment/lhidp39/ 2.https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1enl66o/comment/lhiejg2/