Why does the Sundered Doctrine boss have 18 Zorpillion health?

There's literally zero reason for the boss to have this much health. I mean, I've done 69 phases and the bosses health hasn't gone down at all! I'm using my 3/5 Goondoggle (not crafted, fuck you booger) and it's doing nothing!

I'm tired of Bungo designing endgame content around high-end players. They need to make everything easily soloable and give red borders so I can take care of my 37 kids while Trey (Datto) fucks my wife. I'm tired of these gatekeeping elitists ruining my experience.

/uj I'm pre-ordering my jerk. Sucks to suck, sluggers. Also, how long do you guys think it'll take DtG to make a post complaining about the dungeon being too hard? My guess is ~4 hours (after contest, obviously) before they complain about boss health.