Need Advice on Interfaith Relationship – What Should I Do?

Hey everyone,

I became a believer in God early last year, and around the same time, I started dating my girlfriend, who is Muslim. Since then, I’ve been learning about both Islam and Christianity. I didn’t grow up in a religious home, so I don’t have any emotional attachment or biases toward either faith. I’ve tried to approach this with an open mind, attending prayers, visiting churches and mosques, reading holy texts, and speaking with both imams and pastors.

While my girlfriend has always hoped I might convert to Islam, she’s never pressured me. After months of research and reflection, I’ve come to the conclusion that I can’t be Muslim. There are aspects of Muhammad’s life and Islamic theology that don’t sit well with me (I won’t get into details here, but I’m open to discussion). On the other hand, while I’m not fully committed to Christianity yet, its message resonates with me, and the portrayal of Jesus in the Bible inspires me to become a better person.

Here’s the situation:

I love this girl deeply. We were friends for over a year before dating, and our relationship over the past year has been incredible. We’ve traveled together, share mutual friends, and have similar goals and aspirations. But the one thing we don’t align on is our beliefs.

Recently, we attended a major Muslim conference where I asked more questions about the faith. By the end of it, she reiterated that it’s an absolute must for her to marry a Muslim man. While she isn’t very practicing—she doesn’t wear hijab, doesn’t pray regularly, and enjoys clubbing—she still holds strongly to certain cultural and religious principles, such as keeping our relationship private, avoiding pork and alcohol, and ensuring her future kids are raised Muslim.

Today, she asked about where I stand in my faith journey. I told her I’m still exploring and learning, but I likely can’t convert to Islam due to x, y, and z. She admitted she doesn’t know enough about Islam to teach it to a new convert and mainly follows her personal perception of the faith. I’ve also sought answers from imams, but they couldn’t address my concerns.

This has been an ongoing discussion for six months, and it’s reached a breaking point. She brought up the possibility of ending our relationship, questioning why we should continue if it can’t lead to marriage. Yet, we’re both deeply in love, and the thought of breaking up is devastating.

I told her to judge me by my character—how I treat others, how I treat her, my pursuit of God, and my commitment to becoming a better man. I value family, kids, and a healthy marriage, all of which align with her values. I essentially put the ball in her court, asking her to consider the relationship despite our religious differences.

So, my question is: - What should I do now? - Should I leave the decision up to her? - Should I end things now and save us future heartbreak? - Or should I stay in the relationship, love her as best as I can, and see where it goes?

Thanks in advance!